Your keenness to find a righteous husband is in accordance with teachings of Islam on choosing and marrying a spouse, but you should not reject a person who is known for his good character and religious commitment because of his past. Copyright 2023. The cookie is used to store the user consent for the cookies in the category "Other. Seriously SCARED OF MARRIAGE. Can I worship the Hindu god after I accept Islam? The past is the past, you need to stand up to your family and please be strong inshallah you be happy. Im totally confused and tensed about this. Wa alaikum salaam sis. All praise be to Allah and may His blessings and peace be on His last messenger. Please log in and write your question as a separate post so we can give it the attention it deserves Insha'Allah. I really want to marry this girl but am afraid my family will not let me as for what she did in her past. We know that Allah is the most forgiving and if He forgives his people, then we should also. But opting out of some of these cookies may affect your browsing experience. Select the pious, may you be blessed! (Al-Bukhari and Muslim). Choose the one who is religiously-committed, may your hands be rubbed with dust (i.e., may you prosper). (Narrated by al-Bukhaari, 5090; Muslim, 1466). We appreciate your keenness to adhere to the teachings of Islam in a society such as the one in which you are living. I have tried to get the nikaah registered but they are asking +/- 10,000 for registering and certificate. The cookie is used to store the user consent for the cookies in the category "Performance". I really hope she has not been given such values! This cookie is set by GDPR Cookie Consent plugin. What does is meaning of Sura An-Nur verses 3 and 4? Dont get too friendly. This applies also to women, i.e., a woman should not accept anyone but a man who is religiously committed and of good character. marrying with the intention of divorcing after a certain period, is permissible. The revolutionary government lowered the age of marriage for women from 18 to 13 (in 1979) then to nine (in 1982). I had committed fornication in the past and i have repented from that sin. In some countries or regions there's a custom to ask the husband after the wedding if the wife is virgin this is also a prohibited matter, as nobody should disclose neither himself nor anybody else (especially his wife) when you are getting married via "ma2zoon" that's the person who's doing the marriage and officially getting it done, he makes the statement of "zawagtoka.el-bekr el-rasheed" it means "you are getting married to a completely virgin" and so on the other side? How do we repent for our sin? Adherence to the teachings of Islam, doing the obligatory duties and avoiding the things that are forbidden are not optional for the Muslim, because these are things that Allaah has enjoined upon him. But it DOESNT conquer all. This cookie is set by GDPR Cookie Consent plugin. Us, Contact In this fatwa: There is no problem of getting married to a divorced woman who has kids. Allah knows the fraud of the eyes and all that the breasts conceal.[40:19], Tell the believing men to lower their gaze (from looking at forbidden things), and protect their private parts (from illegal sexual acts, etc.). And now here she is, a completely changed person: A practicing muslim, working for Islam, Masha'Allah. Thank you so much. depends on the level of her "past" some men find it ok for the woman to have had casual romances with guysnothing serious or physicalsome men dont tolerate even that. Secondly, this should not affect a married life at all. What if a girl is not happy with her parents' decision for her husband due to caste? His parents wont accept me because I am not Muslim. Alhamdulillah, I try not to handshake with her even we live in two different cities. By clicking Accept, you consent to the use of ALL the cookies. Why you shouldn't ask her? You also have the option to opt-out of these cookies. why is it that when a women has committed past sins everybody torments her but when a man commits past sins he is forgiven. Marrying a Hindu Girl who Might Become a Muslim (2)-Guide me as my father is going to marry me with another girl as my aunty (cousin's mother) says that she will only marry her with me after her 2 elder sisters will get married i.e. there lots of problems in married life and i gotten scared of marriage. She sounds like a wonderful potential marriage partner Insha'Allah. Marry a man with deen and character. Therefore, the person who does this commits a forbidden act. AMJA ONLINE. My question is that do i have to marry a girl who also committed. How do I tell my parents I want to marry someone else? The cookie is set by the GDPR Cookie Consent plugin and is used to store whether or not user has consented to the use of cookies. This cookie is set by GDPR Cookie Consent plugin. Us, Imams Or should I ignore it altogether? The Prophet SAW advised us to marry young if we can. A story that left me shocked, confused and paranoid. Some of the Sahaabah were mushriks, then they entered Islam and became good Muslims, and they got married, and were not rejected because of what they had done in the past. On multiple occasions the man exits his car to check whether the woman is still alive . A: You both should sincerely repent to Allah Taala for the sin committed and make a firm resolve that you both will lead a pure and chaste life in the future. Yes, iA you can marry her but please be strong and firm enough to stand by her even if your respected family taunts to you about her past to you after marriage. what do yall think ? Hijab is compulsory (Wajib) for a woman according to many evidences in the Book and the Sunnah. These cookies help provide information on metrics the number of visitors, bounce rate, traffic source, etc. Its not over til the Trumpet is Blown Sin and Repentance in Islam, The Sin of Fornication and Adultery Part 1, The Sin of Adultery and Fornication Part 2, The Sin of Adultery and Fornication Part 3. She is of good nature and is fit for me as I think that she can be a good in my life. In my case - i used to be a non-muslim before; and you just can't imagine how many people judge me as being an ex-muslim: it's deeply saddening: not later than yesterday, i went for a haircut and the hairdresser asked me if I reverted to kufr? Can I Marry a Divorced Woman with 3 Kids? The fact that the woman is older the man should not prevent them from Kindly assist on how to get the nikaah properly and how can I correct my mistakes. Out of these, the cookies that are categorized as necessary are stored on your browser as they are essential for the working of basic functionalities of the website. Rasulullah (sallallahu alayhi wa sallam) Praying with His Grandson Sitting on Him, Give me the Biographys of Allama Sayuti and Allama Sharani. Copyright IslamWeb 2023. Yes I feel that too, find the whole prospect pretty daunting myself! Therefore, we support the opinion of the Hanbali scholars who do not permit this kind of marriage since it contradicts the objective of marriage. Just to add, you are not allowed to bring her past up in the future for or against her, unless you want to sin. Search (English), Fatwa I can NEVER forget it, as much as I want to marry her, and as much close she is to her religion, this is a fact that will remain no matter what. Functional cookies help to perform certain functionalities like sharing the content of the website on social media platforms, collect feedbacks, and other third-party features. It is important to keep in mind that although in Islam there is no objection about marrying a girl with a huge age difference, there may be issues with regard to mental compatibility later on, which may cause differences in marriage, opinions, and behaviors in general. These cookies ensure basic functionalities and security features of the website, anonymously. I have a question that i need a bit of guidance in. I told her through text about who I was and our past relationship. She is alone in this cruel world. It is a matter of acceptable cultural norms, not a question of Halaal or Haraam. The best answers are voted up and rise to the top, Not the answer you're looking for? Disclaimer:The conceptualization and recommendations stated in this response are very general and purely based on the limited information provided in the question. All praise and thanks are due to Allah, and peace and blessings be upon His Messenger. We also use third-party cookies that help us analyze and understand how you use this website. I totally agree with Kash advice and everyone else's. While marrying the girl is allowed from an Islamic perspective, there are certain things you need to consider, which you may have missed out because of the strong attraction youre feeling towards her. Undoubtedly this is because the people have deviated from correct understanding of Islam and because they indukge so much in sin and neglect the obligatory duties prescribed in shareeah. Should I let my future partner know about a previous relationship? Please guide me on this, May Allah bless you. Other answers have addressed the muslim perspective but less comment. Only consider who she is right now. [An-Nisaa / The Women 24], If ye fear that ye shall not be able to deal justly with the orphans, But opting out of some of these cookies may affect your browsing experience. Throwaway for privacy reasons mainly. Perhaps, you are right that she has an interest in you. By clicking Accept, you consent to the use of ALL the cookies. Therefore, we do not advise you to marry this woman as long as she is in that state. I feel bad to leave her in this state and the same time i am worried about my imaan as there is always shaitaan between two gair mahrams. We also use third-party cookies that help us analyze and understand how you use this website. This cookie is set by GDPR Cookie Consent plugin. This website uses cookies to improve your experience while you navigate through the website. Encourage her to go to the mosque for prayers, Islamic supports, as well as getting closer to Allah swt. You may need to teach your parents about Islam and forgiveness. Do you want to get married? It is virtuous to conduct it in a mosque keeping the ceremony simple. Anyways, I moved back aged 24. I think considering you both have already been so intimate with each other, you both are perfect for each other. and marries a woman intending that he will divorce her when he leaves that country, is valid according to the second opinion because he does not stipulate a particular period in his marriage contract. i have read many posts in this website. LGBTQ protections: Supreme Court says certain businesses can - CNN Besides it's an logical and undeniable Right to now about your past life partner , expect if you wish to don't ask her. This cookie is set by GDPR Cookie Consent plugin. If you do it sincerely for the sake of helping her and bringing up her children properly and islamically, you will be rewarded by Allah abundantly. She somehow managed and recovered from that depression. I am trying my level best to convince her and encourage her by saying about allah and deen. For this reason, Imam Maalik said: This practice does not suit the character of the Muslims at all. Cheating is not permissible whether it is practiced with a Muslim woman or a non-Muslim woman. Not to say that you are/will have this sort of relationship but we must protect ourselves. This is not consistent with islam, in fact it goes against it! Out of these, the cookies that are categorized as necessary are stored on your browser as they are essential for the working of basic functionalities of the website. Committee, Leadership I recognised it was her (she didn't because it had been years). http://www.marriagemissions.com/when-childhood-sexual-abuse-affects-marriage-intimacy/ Marrying with the intention of divorcing after a certain period is of two kinds: 1. I met a girl whom I want to marry and have children with. She was divorced earlier so she converted to Islam and now we are married. The only thing i found out, which would be acceptable and which you could clearly do is: And most scholars say it's not allowed for the future husband to ask about the past of his future wife (see, On the other hand before wedding both (fianc and fiance) are. You also have the option to opt-out of these cookies. Let the past be the past whether you didnt do haraam things or not do not hold that against her as no one is perfect. JazakhaAllah for your efforts on this site, you've giving some good answers maasha'Allah. I think age is individual requirement. Q: I have done a civil marriage with a non Muslim girl who will convert to Islam, but has not yet converted due to some financial problem. Old novel featuring travel between planets via tubes that were located at the poles in pools of mercury, Is it legal to cross an internal Schengen border without passport for a day visit. Help! 2. Answer Aisha Mohammad 06 August, 2021 In this counseling answer: Only marry her if you truly recognize that her past is no better than yours. Supreme Court Rules on LGBTQ Rights Case - The New York Times You must forget and look to the future may allah guide you both to happiness. While marrying the girl is allowed from an Islamic perspective, there are certain things you need to consider, which you may have missed out because of the strong attraction you're feeling towards her. It is allowed islamically. These cookies track visitors across websites and collect information to provide customized ads. Chat, AMJA Leave it between her and Allah. Let me ask you a question, what about if I plan on marrying someone who's been sexually abused? [Feqh of Muslim Family-Nikah - Women Not-allowed for marriage- Nekah of who committed adultery ], @AshrafBashir It is not me interpreting anything here, you accidentally pasted the Q&A. Once the initial infatuation or attraction is over, you might find her immature, selfish and stubborn. We use cookies on our website to give you the most relevant experience by remembering your preferences and repeat visits. Jazakillaahu Khair! SV, your question is a good one. She prays, wears hijab, and is intelligent as you said. I want to marry her. I have only heard of one instance where a Muslim girl eloped with a non-Muslim man. If they will marry her to someone who is almost 30 years older than the girl herself, already has an established family and kids who are almost the same age as the girl you wish to marry. Reject everyone who is known to have a bad past and has not given it up, because the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) told men: A woman may be married for four things: her wealth, her lineage, her beauty, or her religious commitment. A religious marriage would less straightforward. The cookie is set by GDPR cookie consent to record the user consent for the cookies in the category "Functional". Regarding Nikaah. Thirdly, once you embraced Islam, ALL your sins have . You dont have to be identical but you have to want th same thing. What is the idea of Islam about underage marriage? I ended up having intercourse with her, and multiple times after that. Marrying a woman with whom one had committed adultery (Zina) I fell in love with one girl and i wanted to marry her but she was a hindu. dont turn a blind eye to this issue of the past since its inherent in us men with varying degrees of severity. taking in mind her past, specifically considering that she was in a haraam sexual relation with a guy, wheras i myself have never ever even come near touching a non mehram girl [Alhamdulillah]. These cookies ensure basic functionalities and security features of the website, anonymously. Can I divorce my husband without a valid reason? Some questions about the Misyaar marriage, Marriage announcement: Wisdom behind it and the validity of secret marriage, A marriage contract undertaken by an unauthorized person, He lived with her and now wants her to marry another man, Conducted a doubtful marriage contract and wants to renew it, Religions, Sects and Da'wah (Call to Islam), Jinaayaat (Criminology) and Islamic Judicial System, Islamic Politics and International Affairs, Medical Issues, Media, Culture and Means of Entertainment. Can a Muslim woman marry a Catholic man if she still does If it all possible, insha'Allah assist her in taking these steps to get the help that she needs. The cookie is set by GDPR cookie consent to record the user consent for the cookies in the category "Functional". These cookies help provide information on metrics the number of visitors, bounce rate, traffic source, etc. You should marry her for who she is now, not what she has done in her past. Dream interpretation on marrying a girl - IslamQA Conference, Academic I testify that there is none worthy of worship except Allah, and that Muhammad is His slave and Messenger. what kind of man do we have to marry to avoid these problems Connect and share knowledge within a single location that is structured and easy to search. But, if you have any doubts about whether the girl will be able to adjust to your home, respect you or your parents, I will advise you think about the decision on a deeper level. Can I marry a girl who has a past? - IslamicAnswers.com: Islamic Advice My Brother Is Against Me Marrying a Girl with Trauma - About Islam What is the libertarian solution to my setting's magical consequences for overpopulation? I am sure your parents would understand if you explain it to them in a polite way possible. Is a marriage done over the phone valid according to a hadith quoted by a local ulama? Answer. She obtained her MA degree in Psychology and has over 10 years of experience working in health and social care settings in the UK, USA, and Ireland. Bridge. The difference between Mutah marriage (temporary marriage) and this marriage is that the temporary marriage automatically comes to an end after passing the stipulated period whether the husband likes it or not, while this kind of marriage is not linked to a given period. To subscribe to this RSS feed, copy and paste this URL into your RSS reader. Bank (English), Fatwa Stack Exchange network consists of 182 Q&A communities including Stack Overflow, the largest, most trusted online community for developers to learn, share their knowledge, and build their careers. Search (Arabic), Fatwa captive) that your right hands possess, that will be more suitable, to Advertisement cookies are used to provide visitors with relevant ads and marketing campaigns. To me, the girls behavior points out that she lacks modesty and has a weak character. 21 1. It does not store any personal data. and please do remember her in your special dua. why should your family know on about her past?? Us women (well I am) far too naive and simple, so I just stay completely away. 2022 MIT Integration Bee, Qualifying Round, Question 17, Replacing Light in Photosynthesis with Electric Energy, Improve The Performance Of Multiple Date Range Predicates. Necessary cookies are absolutely essential for the website to function properly. The cookies is used to store the user consent for the cookies in the category "Necessary". At age 21 I officially "discovered" myself. The cookie is used to store the user consent for the cookies in the category "Performance". If he slept around for fun, no. Fatwa Other uncategorized cookies are those that are being analyzed and have not been classified into a category as yet. Fast forward to now (I'm 29 now) and The same girlfriend reappeared in my life as a potential. In no event shall AboutIslam, its counselors or employees be held liable for any damages that may arise from your decision in the use of our services. Im a student of medicine and i have reached the age that i should now get married. But also when someone has a a . In 2002, the Majles raised the age of marriage back to 13 for girls (and to 15 for boys). Simple answer to this oneYes you can marry her..you are even allowed to marry a women who was a prostitute, forgiveness is one of the beauties of Islam. Is marrying an orphan girl considered a greater good deed? . My parents want me to marry a psychologically abusive man, Boyfriend wants me to convert to Islam so that we can marry. Shouldn't it go both ways? A "simpler" description of the automorphism group of the Lamplighter group. It is called 'Al-Satr Ala Alnafs' ( ) which means 'self-covering'. Answer (1 of 16): Yes and no. One with (whom) you are pleased means you think well of him, and are pleased with his religious commitment. Muslim Marrying a Christian Woman - Fiqh The cookie is used to store the user consent for the cookies in the category "Other. In the name of Allah Most It important that you do not hide from your spouse to be about your previous wife and family as it can cause bitter feelings if they find it later on. Fraz. Can a anaf Resident Pray Behind a Shfie Traveller? Simple answer to this one..Yes you can marry her.you are even allowed to marry a women who was a prostitute, forgiveness is one of the beauties of Islam. Is it right to question a girl about her virginity if someone is determined to get married to her. You never know what reward you may receive in return for this action of yours. I'm 29M, getting married later due to longer career path. As that non-muslim guy also abused her taking advantage of her genuine love. Wants to marry a girl who does not wear hijab - Islamweb - Fatwas Answer: Zina (Adultery) has been classed as one of the major sins in Islam Allah Subhanahu Wa Ta'ala has mentioned in the Holy Qur'an: "Do not go near Zina for it is shamelessness and it is an evil way. What if it was your sister instead of your girlfriend? In addition, many people have a past and as long as they realize their mistake and do not return to it, we should learn to forgive them. Would you marry a revert who had a promiscuous past? The general rule of Islam is that Muslims should marry Muslims. I told her about my niyaat to have nikaah with that sister. Repenting for My Past: Marrying a Divorced Non-Muslim Woman I Had Sex With, I am married woman and i love another guy and want 2 marry him without divorcing my first husband. Muslim Marriage: Beliefs, Rules & Customs - GuideDoc to bad men.". I pray to Allah that you are able to reach the right decision, which is better for you and your family in this world as well as in the Hereafter. She became serious about Allah and trying to follow deen in correct way. I got respect and from deep beneath i had respect and immense love for her. But if he has a past record of sin and it is not known whether he had given it up, in such a case you cannot be sure of his morals or religious commitment, so he cannot be accepted as a marriage partner. These cookies help provide information on metrics the number of visitors, bounce rate, traffic source, etc. If the person loved someone for real, then yes, I could consider marriage irrigardless of the persons sinful past. Learn more about Stack Overflow the company, and our products. Even if she is not a virgin, and she repented from adultery, she shouldn't tell you that before marriage. Is it mentioned anywhere in the Quran or Hadith that marrying an orphan girl is a great thing? This cookie is set by GDPR Cookie Consent plugin. It's still akin to Zina. practical islam - Is it appropriate to question a girl about her Resources which clarify this from many Imams and Olama: Every one of my followers will be forgiven except those who expose Necessary cookies are absolutely essential for the website to function properly. Home Hanafi Fiqh Muftionline.co.za Marrying a non-Muslim girl. The Status of a Job Acquired with False Certification. Also note that trying to create a life for a wife must be based on trust & it's an act of "starting life without hidden info that could destroy my life later" so the girl must never lie about this either the man asked or not, but anyway even if the man didn't ask her that question "ma2zoon, always check and ask to make sure of what he will say", well in islam you got it all wrong .. when 2 new partners are going to get married the sheikh (priest) in the ceremony tell the father to say after him " you will marry my daughter the virgin (el bekr el rasheed) so husband needs not to ask, if she is not virgin so she and her father lied and that is another question. Feqh is not about personal interpretations read fatwas at the end of the response, @Shoaib: Read this: - - - "If a man married this woman, and did not knows that she committed adultery (she is not virgin), then the marriage is correct despite this, and she MUSTapply "Sar-al_nafs", and she MUST NOT tell her husband or anyone about what she committed. Research, International If you do it sincerely for the sake of helping her and bringing up her children properly and islamically, you will be rewarded by Allah abundantly. Out of these, the cookies that are categorized as necessary are stored on your browser as they are essential for the working of basic functionalities of the website. Boyfriends father thinks my family isnt educated enough. We also use third-party cookies that help us analyze and understand how you use this website. After 9 years, I came in contact with her again and found that she has broken up with that guy but she was in serious relation with him for 5 years and was in living in with him. The cookie is used to store the user consent for the cookies in the category "Performance". Also, this action of yours will cause her pain as she will be forced to remember her past. These cookies will be stored in your browser only with your consent. If this girl is a Muslim and she repented of Zina and fulfilled the due conditions of repentance, meaning showing remorse, giving up the sin, and resolving never to commit it again in the . Everyone deserves a second chance, what if the roles were reverse wouldnt you want to be given a second chance? Mr. de Blasio's marriage helped fuel his campaign for mayor of New York, and his intense personal and political bond with his wife drew admiration and scrutiny. I will be highly thankful to you. Other uncategorized cookies are those that are being analyzed and have not been classified into a category as yet. Its not over til the Trumpet is Blown Sin and Repentance in Islam, The Sin of Fornication and Adultery Part 1, The Sin of Adultery and Fornication Part 2, The Sin of Adultery and Fornication Part 3, I saw Prophets Moosa, Muhammad and Esaah (peace be upon them all) in my dream. And the biggest thing was that she was in a HARAAm relationship with a boy. How Does a Muslim Get Married? | About Islam
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